Week 8 - Beware of Pride

“Pride adversely affects all our relationships—our relationship with God and His servants, between husband and wife, parent and child, employer and employee, teacher and student, and all mankind.” – Ezra Taft Benson, President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints in 1989

This week in my Marriage class through Brigham Young University-Idaho, I had the great privilege of studying a couple of books and a talk pertaining to Pride, in other words a speech given at church, and it got me thinking about how I have dealt with pride growing up.

For instance, when I was a teenager at this annual three-day family camp for the deaf and hard of hearing, two of my friends and I had to sit through some lecture in the cafeteria with our age group. To be honest, I really do not remember what the lecture was about. The three of us were bored out of our minds. We thought we were too good for whatever the adults were talking about. So, the three of us quietly plotted in the back. It was quite easy to do, since we were able to communicate through sign language. One person would request to use the bathroom, the next person would wait a couple of minutes then do the same. Soon, the three of us were finally outside. We were finally free! Freedom at last! Then it rained. We wanted to go back inside, out of the cold and into a nice, warm building with lots of free hot chocolate. Unfortunately, there was an adult standing guard at the door. They would not let us back in. Something about opening the door might disrupt the lecture inside. So, my two friends and I spent the rest of the lecture standing outside with our faces pressed to the glass as we watched our fellow teenagers get up and grab some hot chocolate then resume listening to the lecture.

This photo from Google Images best depicts the hot chocolate portion of the story above.

There is another time that pride took over in my life. I went through a major bowel surgery about ten years ago. About a foot of small intestines got removed because it caused too many health issues. I recovered in the hospital for over a week. By the tenth day, I have had enough of it. I was done. I wanted to get out. I felt like I was strong enough to take on school. School was about to start in about three days. My family, a discharge nurse, and other medical staff were in the room as I got ready to finally leave. I went into the bathroom one more time, used the toilet, then noticed blood in the water. I bit my bottom lip then flushed. The nurse asked if I was good to go. My lower back hurt like heck and the thought of the toilet flashed back into my mind. I shook off the thought and figured I will overcome it. I can handle anything! I told the nurse I was indeed ready to go. Three days later, I was back in the hospital with kidney failure. I did not even make it through an hour of school. Thankfully I did not end up on dialysis yet.

These two stories of different forms of pride have one major thing in common. Enmity. President Benson has once said that enmity means “hatred toward, hostility to, or a state of opposition.” I opposed sitting through a lecture and I did not want to stay in the hospital for much longer. President Benson has stated, “When pride has a hold on our hearts, we lose our independence of the world and deliver our freedoms to the bondage of men’s judgment. The world shouts louder than the whisperings of the Holy Ghost. The reasoning of men overrides the revelations of God, and the proud let go of the iron rod.”

When it comes to marriage, I know pride can take hold and cause quite a few rifts. Especially in the form of power-sharing with a spouse. Dr. H. Wallace Goddard, author of Drawing Heaven into Your Marriage, has said, “Satan will laugh us into conflict and misunderstanding-unless we yield to the enticings of the Holy Spirit and put off the natural man (see Mosiah 3: 19)” (Goddard, p. 71).

Fortunately, Dr. John Gottman, author of The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work, the Revised edition, has said “…if you’re able to take responsibility for your difficulty with power-sharing, that will be a major leap forward. Your spouse is likely to feel a great sense of relief and renewed optimism about improving your marriage. The next step is to make your partner an ally in your crusade to overcome this problem” (Gottman, p. 136).

In essence, when we humble ourselves, look towards Jesus Christ, serve others, and repent then we can overcome pride.

Photo found through Google Images to depict serving others through Christlike love.